Super Quinoa Salad

according to Wikipedia, quinoa is being considered a possible crop in NASA's Controlled Ecological Life Support System for long-duration manned spaceflights.

2/3 cup quinoa
2 Tbs olive oil
1 tsp whole cumin seeds
300g kumara (sweet potato) - chopped in biggish chunks
80g dried cranberries
6 cherry tomatoes - chopped
Handful salad leaves

1) Boil quinoa in 1 1/2cups water, remove from heat after 10 mins to absorb water. Add olive oil & season with salt & pepper, add cumin seeds & set aside to cool.
2) Grill or shallow fry kumara till tender.
3) Toss rest of the ingredience

Iran Iran Iran

STARTER

Kashke Bademjan (Eggplant Dip)

• 1 large eggplant
• ½ onion thinly sliced
• 1 clove garlic
• 1/3 cup sour cream
• Salt & olive oil
• Dr Food whole grain pita bread to serve
  

Peel eggplant whole and slice a few gashes on the side, rub all over in salt immediately and let sit for 20 minutes. Slice egg plants in thin slices, oil liberally and then grill in medium heat till golden brown, set aside and cool when ready. Meanwhile sear garlic and onions in frying pan till golden brown, set aside and cool. Roughly pulse/blend all ingredients together with sour cream so that it still has a chunky texture. Arrange on flat plate garnished with flat leaved parsley and a sprinkle of light spices of your choice. Toast pita and scoop it all up!

MAINS

Dizi (Lamb Stew)

Prepare 7 hours before serving

• 1.2 Kilograms of freerange lamb shoulders, diced into 3 x 3 cm chunks, keep a bone if poss
• 2 onions - roughly chopped
• 2 clove garlic - roughly chopped
  
• 2 tsp tumeric
• 1 litre water
• 1 Tbs salt
  
• 1 can tomatoes
• 1 can chickpeas
• 6 potatoes cut into chunks
  
• 2 Tsp tomato paste
• Pickles to serve
  

Heat oil and fry 1 of the onions & garlic in medium heat with tumeric, then turn to medium high. Fry lamb quickly to seal in the juice, turn heat off as quickly as possible after this. Place this into a large pot. Add canned tomatoes and tomatoe paste and any bones and fat. Put enough water into the pot to just cover the ingredients with salt. Turn heat on to low. Let this simmer for 5 hours or so. Then add potatoes and the other onion for the last 2 hours. Serve with picked vegetables such as gherkins or green chillis.
- Traditionally this dish is cooked and served in small clay pots called dizi, with very large chunks of pure lamb fat. The way you're suppose to eat this dish is to drain the liquid and soak it up with bread, then mash the rest of the content with a small hammer. When not in an ideal world a less fatty and unmashed version was accepted by my guests.

Joojeh Kabab (Chicken Skewers)

• Skinned chicken chunks in 2.5 cm cubed pieces
• Juice of 1 lime
• 2 Tbsp olive oil
• Salt & pepper
• Capsicums in 2.5 cm cubed pieces
• Toothpicks soaked in water

Marinate chicken overnight or at least 3 hours in olive oil, lime juice and salt & pepper. Skew up alternative chunks with capsicums. Grill in medium heat till lightly brown. Serve immediately with lime wedges, fresh tomatoes slices, and pickles.

Damy (fried rice with grains)

• Cooked basmati rice – 1 cup per person
• Cooked grain mix – eg. brown, red lentils, split peas mixture of chopped nuts such as pistachios, cashews or almonds
• ½ chopped onions
• Salt & pepper
• Grape seed oil for frying

Sear onions in oil and salt & pepper till golden brown. Add grains first and fry till a bit crispy. Then add rice, fry for 8 – 10 minutes.

Kateh (steamed rice)

• Basmati rice - 1 cup per person
• Approx 8 saffron strands soaked in ¼ cup boiling water for at least 30 minutes
• 100 g Barberries soaked in hot water

Prepare rice in steamer or by absorption method as you usually would. Remove saffron strands from soaked water, add 2/3 cup of the cooked rice in it to colour it and return to heat of some sort to let the colour set in some more. To serve, pile white rice on bottom in a pyramid shape, then sprinkle yellow rice on top. Drain barberries from water and garnish liberally.

DESSERT

Bombay Oranges

OK I cheated with a Gordon Ramsay recipe here but it was a refreshing finish to the afternoon nevertheless.

Croatian Inspired Mackerel Angelhair

This recipe was inspired by my recent travels to Croatia down through the Dalmatian Adriatic coast, where seafood is the staple and everything is always always served with garlic and parsley in lovely lush crisp locally produced olive oil. This is a fresh summery pasta best served with a chilled rose' or sauv blanc while you lounge by the balcony watching the waves roll in.

You will need:
2 tins regular mackerel (300g each), well flaked
Angelhair pasta enough for two
2 - 3 cloves garlic, crushed & finely chopped into the finest extent you can get it
2 handfuls of flatleaved continental parsley, roughly chopped
3-4 Tbsp extra virgin olive oil
Sea salt & cracked black pepper to taste

Method:

1) Marinate garlic in olive oil and salt & pepper for 20 - 30 minutes
2) Boil paste till al dente. Drain.
3) Mix with olive oil/garlic while still hot, toss well
4) Add flaked mackerel & parsley, toss well.
5) Serve hot or cold with extra pepper or olive oil to garnish.

A Quron is Born

You’ve heard of soy chicken, you’ve heard of konnyaku octopus, and now you’ve heard of QUORN!

Whether you’re a vegetarian because you can’t bare the thought of blood spraying out of the neck of the poor little wee lamb that was just bouncing across the paddock this morning, or because you can’t cope with the fact that one cow will produce environmental waste of 20 – 40 human beings per day, or because you need to cut down meat so that you don’t get heart disease of bowel cancer, or that you are just a die hard fan of Linda and Paul McCartney, you are still likely to be in the fake meat market because you are still psychologically driven to want to look at, smell, and taste the flesh of another dead animal. So in our strange world of the clashes of the determined will and uncontrollable lust, we are constantly looking for substitutes for a nice slab of meat. Or you’re just a meat eater and wants to know what all the fuss in about cos its just damn bloody fun isn’t it?

QUORN is a weird little product that is made out of mycoprotein made out of fungus (not mushroom but just a form of pure gunky greyish brown stuff that will grow anywhere wet and dark – yup). Once hugely suspected and mistrusted in the vego community across the world – largely due to rumours that it is a) genetically modified and b) the product uses battery hen eggs. Apparently since then QUORN has cleaned up its act and did some proper PR and marketing to defuse those concerns, and now it seems like every yuppy vego or vego-curious is experimenting with QUORN.

Here is one recipe from the divine Ms Curlz and one from myself.

QUORN LAB (Ms Curlz)

250g QUORN
150g Firm Tofo – cut in 1 x 4 cm cube strips. (pre-soaked in some soy sauce while the onion and garlic are cooking)
1 onion – diced
3 cloves garlic
500g baby spinach
1 vine cherry tomatoes (approx 16)
Soy sauce
Fish Sauce
Sesame Oil

1) Saute onions and garlic in shallow pan in sesame oil till clear and translucent.
2) Remove the onions and garlic from the pan and let them sweat in a bowl covered with gladwrap
3) add the tofu to the pan and fry till light brown
4) Remove the tofu from the pan and add QUORN, then adding a swill (prob between 1-2 tbsp) of both fish sauce and soy sauce and cook for a few minutes
5) Separately sear tomatoes on the vine in olive oil till skin is lightly broken
6) Toss into salad bowl with baby spinach and let the leaves wilt with existing heat of the mixtures.

MaQUORN ToFU (WaWa)

250g QUORN
150g Silken Tofo – chopped in large squares
2 cloves garlic diced
2 – 3 sprigs spring onions chopped
100g green beans chopped
2 – 3 Tbsp Garlic Chilli Paste (best from Lee Kum Kee)
2 Tbsp soy sauce
1 - 2 tsp pepper
2 – 3 Tbsp corn flour mixed well in 1 ½ cup cold water

1) Sauté garlic in oil in pan till lightly cooked. Add in beans, then QUORN, then soy, pepper and chilli paste. Mix and stir fry for 2 – 3 minutes till well mixed in.
2) Add in spring onions
3) Turn heat to low. Slowly add the corn flour water in gradually and well spread across the pan. This will start to goo slowly and make sure you stir well but slowly to encourage the gravy. Add more water or corn flour to get consistency you desire
4) Add in tofu at the end, careful not to break it up too much.
5) Serve on piping hot rice.

Turkish Apple Ice cream

I am still trying my hardest to understand Turkish ice cream. Its a lot thicker and stickier than the European version/ gelati, and also I suspect a different sugar is used to make them. Anyway its a funny odd thing and I must say the variety I bought just got a little bit too sickening. So I blended it up with some apples (the Turks are ofcourse famous for their apples/apple teas) and lemon juice, and surprisingly it gave it a great kick and its recommendable!!

You will need:
200g Turkish ice cream (plain or vanilla)
1 apple - cored but not skinned, chopped in pieces
Juice of 1/2 lemon

Blend all and serve with mint garnish

Traffic Light Hummus

This is the winning recipe to the best looking Hummus at the World's First Hummus Making Competition (18 May 2008, Hampstead, London), by Ms Wendy Curls and myself.

For the Mosh Pit (ie. Big bowl of base before you mix in flabours) blend the following by hand or by blender:

• 2 cups boiled chickpeas (soaked overnight & boiled till tender with dash of salt)
• 1/4 cups olive oil
• 1/5 cups tahini (sesame paste)
  
• Juice of 1/2 - 1 lemon
• 2 cloves garlic crushed
• Salt & pepper to taste
  

For each of the following blends here are the extras you need:

Yellow Hummus (Original)

• 1/2 teaspoon of cumin
• garnish with crushed walnuts
  

Green Hummus

• 6 - 8 chopped green olives
• 1/2 cup chopped coriander leaves
• 1/2 teaspoon cumin
• garnish with few more sprigs of coriander
  

Red Hummus

• 5 Roughly chopped sundried tomatoes (don't blend so that you can still taste the chunks)
  
• 2 -3 teaspoons (yes that's right) Hungarian paparika
• another 2 - 3 teaspoons lemon juice
• garnish with paparika
  

Serve in a trio and garnish with a drizzle of olive oil.

Blogger's Note: You may remember another winning recipe from my Melbourne Cup spread in 2006 that is done uniquely by replacing tahini with sour cream. On this occasion my sour cream was found to be un-kosher for a Jewish festival, and hence banned from the competition. But I would still highly encourage you to try that recipe should you be able to source some kosher sour cream, which I have been told is in fact very common.

Lastly but not leastly I would like to thank my partner in cooking crime, Ms Wendy Curls for her energy and enthusiasm and utterly fantastic cooperation in making our win possible.

Salmon Wrapped in Pancetta - by Wendy

Please welcome another seasoned veteran on the food scene, with our well loved salmon, my next guest writer, Ms Wendy Curls.

Salmon wrapped in Pancetta

The original recipe calls for a pea puree, however as I am not a huge fan of peas I have always left this part out. The picture did have a certain aesthetic charm: imagine dusky orange salmon, pink, crisp pancetta on a pile of fresh green goo!

You will need:

• salmon fillets (If you can, cut or have your fillets cut into the rectangular size fillet you see in the supermarket)
• pancetta or streaky bacon
• new potatoes (pesto as a garnish)
• green beansbroccoli

1. Take your salmon fillets and give them a wee rinse under the tap. Sometimes they will still have scales attached and of course you might have to remove the skin. Pat them dry with a paper towel and sear each side on a low heat in a pan with a tiny bit of olive oil. Remove them from the pan and wrap them in the pancetta (my technique was captured by FB here: [video])
2. Bake in the oven for around 10 - 12 mins until the pancetta is crispy (not burnt).
3. Cook your veges until al dente (or however you like them) and serve the potatoes with pesto!

Enjoy!Blogger's note: You will also notice that Wendy forgot to mention the lovely side garlics she served on the occasion which kept the house quite aromatic for the rest of the week.

Okinawawa - by Pierrot

I am getting the feeling that I am not getting much inspiration for food as of late, so I have decided to introduce (sparringly) a few good friends as guest writers to this kitchen blog to give it a bit of kick.

Please put your hands together and welcome the first guest writer to my recipe blog, the magnificent Pierrot (right).

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Okinawawa

We all know that the staple foods of Okinawa, and the reason the Okinawans have the highest life expectancy in the whole world, is down to a combination of the unassuming but antioxidant-rich kumera (sweet potato), and an elaborate menagerie of endangered seafood. But what most of the world is completely unaware of is that those plucky New Zealanders, being champions of taking their abject poverty with good-humoured creativity, have managed to add to the Japanese culinary tradition by creating the most hardcore vinegar known to humanity out of the ostensibly useless juices drawn from kegs of mature Umeboshi (see www.ceres.co.nz). The nature of this vinegar is such that it must be used cautiously and sparingly. However if you stick to these, not conservative but measured principles, then you can use it to enhance the flavour of basic ingredients which normally call for a more subtle approach.

The following dish, cobbled together by one of Wawa’s most distant fans, combines the two essentials of Okinawan cuisine, and the one essential of Wawa cuisine (ie inexplicably good luck), and is simple and accessible enough for anyone outside of Bangladesh to whip up on a week night.

Ingredients:

1 slab of salmon for each person, with the skin on

Enough kumera for the number of people you are having over for dinner

A corresponding amount of Dijonnaise (a mixture of mayonnaise and Dijon mustard)

¼ of a red capsicum, finely diced

½ a red chilli, minced

2 cloves of garlic, minced

1 handful of Italian parsley, finely chopped

1 sprig of rosemary

4 sage leaves, finely chopped

3 tbsp butter

juice of half a lime

1 tbsp of Umeboshi vinegar

rocket

olive oil

salt and pepper

Perform the three following operations so that they are completed at the same time.

Salmon: Warm a fan-forced, grill-equipped oven to 180°C. Rub salmon with olive oil, salt and pepper. Place skin-side up on a cake cooler or similar attractively-patterned metal platform. Place in oven and cook until the sides of the fish turn a light pink, cooked salmon colour. The objective is to cook the fish slowly and evenly all the way through. Once adequately cooked, turn the grill to high, so that the salmon skin crisps up and comes away from the flesh. Remove from the oven. Peel the skin off the salmon and discard.

Kumera: Chop kumera into golf ball-sized pieces, place in a saucepan and add water up to half the height of the kumera pieces. Sprinkle with salt. Cook over a medium flame until soft enough to mash. Mash kumera with remaining water, adding Dijonnaise, a decent amount of chopped parsley, and ground pepper to taste.

Umeboshi sauce: Melt a small amount of butter in a small saucepan over medium heat. Add garlic, chilli and sage, and fry for 30 seconds. Reduce flame, add the rest of the butter and stir until melted. Add capsicum, rosemary, lime juice, and Umeboshi vinegar. Cook over low flame for at least 5 minutes.

Spread mashed kumera on a plate. Place salmon on top of mashed kumera, so that the underside (which hopefully has taken on the pattern from the cake cooler) is facing upwards. Pour the desired quantity of sauce over the salmon. Garnish with rocket, parsley and ground pepper.

Serve with miscellaneous greens, for example lettuce, broccoli, blanched Asian greens or finely sliced pears (rocket being the only essential), because they’re good for you too. But go easy on the dressing, or better yet go without.

Eat it.
Do the washing up.
Go to bed early.
Don’t believe everything you read.

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Legal Note: The blog owner is not directly responsible for the content or the consequences thereafter caused by the trying out of the recipes posted by guest writers.

Ban Sa (Vietnamese noodle salad)

This is simply a blind stab at replicating a meal I tried at the Vietnamese Restaurant near Old Street a couple of weeks ago. It worked and knocked the socks of my new landlady. Hope it works for you too!

Ingredients

Rice noodles (80g per person)
Fresh bean sprouts (3/4 cup per person)
Shredded assorted fresh veges eg. carrots, cabbage, red cabbage, red capsicums (small handful)
Spring onions - 1 sprig diced
Half of one red onion - thinly sliced
1 red chilli finely sliced
2 cloves garlice diced
1 Tbsp brown sugar
1/2 cup fish sauce
Juice of one lime
Coriander - one bunch well sliced
Lean pork - sliced thinly (can be easily substituted by chicken, fish or firm tofu)
Dash of soy sauce
Cooking oil

Method

1. Marinate red onions, most of the crushed garlic, red chillis in lime juice, fish sauce and brown sugar for at least 20 minutes. The salt in the fish sauce and the lime juice will take the sharp odur off the onions and garlic. Adjust amount of sauces and sugar to suit taste.
   
2. Pour boiling hot water onto uncooked rice sticks and cover for 5 minutes. Drain and rince with cold water immediately to prevent from further cooking. Drain well, roughly chop into smaller length with scissors and set aside.
   
3. Sear pork on high heat with oil, remainder of garlic and dash of soy sauce till cooked. Set aside.
4. Toss rest of the ingredients together and serve. Best accompanied by a crsip beer.
   

Pumpkin Tofu Curry

This is a fushion South East Asian-Indian dish that's perfectly vegan as it has plenty of vegetable proteins, and minimum allergy causing ingredients. Ensure you use canned/fresh coconut milk rather than block solids as it is too fatty for this combo.

You Will Need

300g sweet pumpkin - skin removed and diced into 2.5 by 2.5cm cubes
250g firm tofu - cut into 2.5 cm2 cubes
1 onion - half moon sliced
400mL can coconut milk
1 cup frozen beans
Assorted curry powder
brown sugar (if desired)
Softly cooked brown rice to serve
Corriander to garnish

Soy sauce to flavour
Fish sauce to flavour if catering for pesca-vegans

Method

1. Saute onions in oil on medium-high heat in a pot, add in a dash of salt and assorted curry powder, cook till onions turn just clear
   
2. Add pumpkin to the pan and turn heat slightly higher, cook for about 5 minutes, then add coconut milk and tofu. Cover and cook for further 8 - 10 minutes or till the pumpkins are just tendering. Taste the dish now and adjust flavouring to suit by adding more salt, curry powder or a dash of brown sugar
   
3. Add in frozen beans, cover for another 2 - 4 minutes till its all hot.
   
4. Serve on rice, garnish with corriander and sauce.
   

Spice it up with Lentil Soup

I thought spring in London would be just manageable -- nah uh. Its bitterly cold, grey and windy. The best sancturies for the weary hearted are the cosy narrow shopfronts of cafes so abundant on the streets. It warms you up instantly and recharges you to face the bleak air outside. If I had a cafe in London I would cook this:

You will need

Core ingredients
1 carrot (diced)
1 onion (diced)
2 sticks celery (diced)
2 cloves garlic (crushed)
1 Tsb salt
1 can tomatoes
1 cup red lentils
3 cups home made stock

Seasoning (pinch of each)
Chilli flakes (my favourite are these ones I got in Rome - see pic)
Curry powder (or any combo of tumeric, cumin, garam masala etc)
Paparika
Pepper
Coriander and/or italian parsley to garnish

1) Saute onions, celery & carrots in cooking oil on med/high heat in large soup pot, add salt & spices.

2) When just cooked, add lentils and coat well with oil. After 1 minute or so add canned tomatoes, crushing if they are not the chopped variety. Leave to simmer for another 3 or 4 minutes.
3) Add stock. Mix well, turn up heat and boil for 8 - 10 minutes. Turn heat to lowest and simmer for 20 - 30 minutes, carefully stirring occasionally to avoid burning.
4) Garnish and serve with crusty toast, best ones are with cheese, melted or unmelted.

Sashimi & Potato Salad

You will need

• Baby potatoes, halved or in thumb sized chunks x 150g per serve
• Raw salmon, cubed x 70g p/s
• Egg mayonnaise x 35g p/s
• Wasabi powder x 1/4 tsp p/s
• Spring onions finely chopped x 1 sprig
• Rock salt x a pinch
• Nori finely chopped (garnish)
• Coriander finely chopped (garnish)
• 1 - 2 wonton skins
  
• cooking oil
  

Method

1. Boil the potatoes till tender, run through some cold water & let cool aside.
   
2. Thoroughly mix wasabi powder into mayonnaise, making sure any lumps are broken in (or someone could be in for a nasty surprise)
   
3. Brush wonton skins with cooking oil on both sides. Grill for 6-8 minutes or until the skin begins to form bubbles and turn golden brown. Remove from oven & cool. Crush gently & set aside. These are now affectionately known as wontoncroutons.
   
4. Toss potatoes and half the spring onions into wasabi-mayo til all coated
5. Top with salmon, sprinkle rock salt & wontoncroutons evenly, garnish & serve.

Home Grown Potatoes

Many people don't chose to grow potatoes even though its really easy to, simply because its so cheap to buy them these days and it takes up a lot of space. But given the amount of artificial fertilisers large commercial growers use these days, knowing that your own stuff is organic and safe is still a peace of mind. They all come in different shapes and sizes in your own garden, which is what food is really meant to be like, and it tastes bloody delicious.

I found these growing at the edge of mum's compost heap, hidden in the corner in the goat's pen and looked like the rabbits took a bite of one but decided it wasn't good enough... Being on a farm you can afford to have basically as many compost heaps as you'd like and as big as you'd like 'em.

I love finding this sort of stuff when just digging around the garden, it works with stuff like kumaras and jerusalem artichotes (as we had in Canberra last year). Its kinda like a growing time capsule - remembering the time when you last saw it many moons ago, it was a mulchy looking spawning rotting old spud and now its turned into a field of gentle white flowers, with little ruby gems hidden beneath, waiting to be devoured...

Duck salad in Dark Cherry Sauce

Ingredience
Poached duck, skin on - 120g per serve
Mescillin salad - 150g per serve
Cucumbers - 20g p/s sliced or shredded
Avocados - 1/4 per serve, sliced
Spring onions - 1 sprig, finely sliced
Lemon juice - a dash
Pepper & Rock or sea salt - a dash
Soy sace - 20mL
Honey - 1 Tbsp
Cherries - 6 per serve. Pitted and halved
Greek style full cream yoghurt
Coriander to garnish

Method
1) Make sauce - combine soy sauce, honey & add cherry. Simmer & stirr in gentle heat till all is cooked and infused. Cool aside.
2) Toss all other salad ingredience & drizzle lemon juice, cherry sauce & greek yoghurt & garnish.

Meet my Brad Pitter. Usually you can find it under the name of olive and/or cherry pitter at the homewear goods shop - they don't all look like this one, some have a domed holder end, for example and a grippable handle. This one was a present from Emma and Wendy one Christmas or a birthday many years ago, and it is a well loved and respected member of my kitchen. Some people categorise the pitter as one of those extravagent utensils that takes up space cos its hardly ever used - they can never be more wrong. It simply is fun to use, clean, pretty, and as a big fan of pitted things and not half crushed things - i highly recommend any serious entertainer a set of these efficient sidekicks.

GG Martini

Shake and serve:
Juice of 2 grapefruits (just under 1 cup)
2 shots of gin
1 shot of vodka
Ice
Serves 2

Tis the sunny season and mum and dad's tree is o'fruit'n. Feel the enamel of your teeth melt as you squeeze the brain out of these puppies.

Camel Burger

Hungry and lost in a market in Meknes, Morocco. I am sure this is of much disgust to Tinkerbell, but hey, this may be the one and only time I get to eat this thing.

You will need:

For Patties
Camel meat, minced (don't ask what part, just take it) x 70g per serve
Flour - to roll

For Compliments:
Round baguette x 1 per serve - cut in half and then again sideways to resemble a pocket
Grilled sliced onions
Grilled egg plants and zuccinis
Salat de Maroc - diced tomatoes, onions, cucumber, morrocan feta in olive oil
Harissa (hot chilli sauce)

Method
1) Roll camel meat into small balls. Roll lightly in some flour, fry on hot plate till cooked. This is important as it may have sat in heat and fly-lavae for a while.
2) Place in baguette, add compliments and sauce. Eat fresh.

Camel meat has a smooth supple texture. It is actually quite fatty but unlike beef or lamb, the fat does not get clumpy or coat your mouth or make you feel bloated. It is simply a delicate light meat without any pungent odure. It is definitely the texture rather than flavour that is the highlight.

Eye Ball Popping Piri Piri Sauce

HOT HOT HOT!

Steam is coming out of my ears - this is honestly the most satisfying brain hemorrhage inducing stuff I've tasted since Rama's extra hot tikka masala. Phhoooooooooooooooffff!!

You will need:
3 large red chilis n- roughly chopped
2 cloves garlic - peeled
Juice of 1 lemon
half hand full italian parsley
1 Tsp olive oil
1 tsp sea salt
1 packet (150g) tomato paste

Pulse all together in the blender. Preserve in jar in fridge for up to 2 weeks.

I had these with chicken breasts - marinate for 1/2 hours before grilling in medium-high heat. Serve with a cucumber type salad to edge off the heat.

Noodle Art

This is a fun little project for when you've got some left over noodles and plenty of time.

Ingredience:
1 fairly long unbroken cooked noodle, cold if possible or you may burn youself.
Method:
Flop and curve noodle over non-stick or pre-greased objects such as spoons, chopsticks, plastic bottle tops or the kitchen wall. It needs to be stable and unable to move. Leave to dry over night and remove. Display however and where ever you like. In this case I have made a Loch Ness Monster and placed it next to a plastic crab for effect.

NB1: For advanced players, experiment with different types of noodles and combinations thereof (eg. pasta, egg noodles, rice noodles, soba noodle... possibilities are boundless really.)
NB2: This may still be edible if you consume this within 3 days in coldish climate.

Grilled Tiger Campsicums & Endives salad

(these things are quite tiny, no more than about 10cms long each, and the flesh is thin but substantial & flavoursome)

The Japanese organic farmers that are always on time at the Northside farmers markets here in Canberra are possibly my most trusted food source when it comes to salad suppliers. Their varieties are mostly newly developed japanese ones, so I could hardly find anything on the internet on how to prepare them. The organic nature of the veges really make me feel assured tucking into these things.

Salad leaves are usually over prayed by chemicals particularly if they have to travel and store for days before getting onto the table. A friend of mine that slogged her days as a supermarket assistant in the vege section said her hands used to sting after packing lettuces because of the harsh pesticides. Imagine that in your stomach, particularly if they are to be eaten raw etc.

Ingredience
Tiger Capsicums x 6 per serve
3 - 4 cloves garlic, dash of olive oil, sprinkle of rock/sea salt for roasting dish
Endive leaves x 250g per serve
Shredded nori

Method
1)Place tiger capscicums evenly on thinly olive oiled roasting dish, lightly crush garlic without removing skin, sprinkle with salt
2) Grill in medium heat till skin of caps are lightly brown
3) Serve chilled or warm on bed of fresh endives garnished with light shreds of nori drizzled with olive oil from tray, dash of pepper.

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The earthy smokey flavour of the tiger capsicums and its intense flesh made this dish taste extremely sexual. It made me fantacise about being in an alley way in New York with a Jamaican who has just smoked a dozen cuban cigars & doused in rum. (???).

Kimchi Tapanade

Ingredience
150g cabbage kimchi, roughly chopped
120g firm tofu, roughly chopped
10 stuffed green olives, roughly chopped
1 tsp black sesames, toasted
1 clove garlic
1 tsp sesame oil
1/2 tsp Lee Kum Kee garlic chilli sauce
1 tsp lemon juice
1/4 sprig spring onions - shredded for garnish

Method
Blend all coarsely, garnish, and serve with rice crackers

I remember the year when I was 11, and Mum went overseas for a month and Dad had to cook for us. On the first night he made this big pot of soup where he chucked in everything he could find in the fridge & boiled it up. It was so huge that we couldn't finish it. The next night he found more stuff to chuck into the left over soup and added more water. And so on and so on. It was still the same pot of soup when mum got back. This is like that, except much better.

Great Christmas Lunch Idea

http://www.thesalmons.org/lynn/dishwasher.html

Certainly adds a new meaning to multipurpose.

The Most Kick-arse-est Mushroom Risotto in the World

This is dedicated to Herr Peter Wenzel - friend, flatmate, artist, mushroom scientist and six foot two worth of inspiration.

You will need:
Home made chicken stock* x 2 cups per serve
Aborio rice x 1/2 cup per serve
Porcini mushrooms (dried) 25g per serve
Button mushrooms x 2/3 cup per serve - sliced
Oyster mushrooms x a handful - roughly chopped
Black or yellow fungus x a handful - roughly chopped
Another selection or two of field/flat/straw/wild/shitake variety of mushrooms fresh if poss - sliced if its a big mushroom, roughly chopped if its a little mushroom.
Cheap bottle of white (but be reasonable)
onion - 1/2 per serve, diced
garlic - 3 clobes, crushed
Olive oil - 2 Tbsp
butter - 1 Tbsp
Italian (continental parsley) - shopped- 1/4 cup per serve
Parmesan or pecorino cheese - shredded - 1/4 per serve plus garnish

Method

1. Soak porcinis in 1 cup of boiling water. Set aside to cool.
2. Heat up stock in a seperate sauce pan adjacent to the main cooking stove, keep on medium heat.
3. In a sturdy hard based pan, saute oil, garlic and oninos with a dash of salt in med-high heat till just clear
4. Remove porcinis from water, squeeze all moist back into the liquid, save the liquid while adding porcinis into onions. Turn heat to medium-low. Add all the other mushrooms and saute lightly before turning heat to low.
   
5. Add aborio rice, stirring quickly to coat it all in oil. Only allow this to be in the pan for less than one minute before adding a ladel of stock. Quickly stirr stock evenly into the rice.
   
6. When the first ladel of stock is almost evaporated - but not quite - otherwise it will burn and that is NO GOOD - add a splash of white wine. Stirr this again till just it almost evaporates. Then add another ladel of stock.
7. Repeat this alternatively with stock and wine, stirring constantly to allow even absorption and protect from burning or the rice sticking at the bottom. Ensure the heat remains low.
   
8. By now the contents should be expanding quite well - switch off the heat just as rice is beginning to 'melt into each other'. Remove from heat and stand (you may choose to give it a cover) for 5-7 minuites.
   
9. Stirr in evenly firstly the butter, then the parmesan, then the parsley.
   
10. Serve immediately and garnish liberally with more parsley and parmesan.

*Home made stock: Boil two chicken bones (very cheap from the supermarkets) in water with a couple of tablespoons of salt and two onions roughly chopped. Simmer in low heat for around two hour before disgarding solid content.

Homemade pasta

Love and admiration from your friends are completely worth the time and labour over this frivolously tiresome recipe. Durum flour is the secret to the fine silky smoothness of the pasta and organic eggs ensures a full nutty whole flavour.

Ingredience
Organic eggs (1 medium size per serve)
Durum flour (approx 1.5 cups per serve)
Fresh or frozen spinach (80g per serve) - only if you are doing green pasta

Method
1) Clean out bench top with fresh paper towels and without use of any chemical detergents - lemon juice or vinegar are always good natural anticeptics. Clean your hands too - remove shit like jewellery, crusty nails and flaky skin from yourself.
2) Measure out around 2 cups of flour on the bench top or a bowl, build a mountain top then make a puddle whole. Break egg(s) into puddle whole.
3) Knead eggs into flour with fingers and palms, using your own judgement (don't drink too much before you do this) till you feel that the dough has just started to form into ONE big lump, but moist and soft enough to not gather firmly.
4) keep kneading without adding too much extra flour.
5) divide dough into manageable balls for going through the pasta machine, probably two balls per serve.
6) This is the labour intensive bit. Pass the dough throug the flat bit of the machine as many times as necessary till it is in a flat, smooth, bubbleless and lumpless flat sheet. It could take you as many as 25 or 30 goes per sheet. Part of life mate.
7) Chop into the width you desire either with knife or the thin settings on the machine
8) Sprinkle with extra flour to keep it from sticking together, cover with glad wrap to refrain from drying
9) Boil water with dash of salt and oil. Add pasta just at boiling point, cook till al dente and serve immediately

If you are doing the spinach bit:
Lightly blanch the spinach in boiling water ensuring not to over cook it. Drain and squeeze as much water out of it as possible (use a paper towel after the sift) , chop finely and add to dough just before its ready to go into the machine. The pressing/flatting process will further refine the leaves and make the pasta green.

NB1: This does not keep well raw so it needs to be cooked on the same day

NB2: As this is fresh, expensive and labour intensive pasta, I suggest that this is served with a fairly simple/non-heavy sauce so that the pasta speaks for itself. Suggestions a) classic olive oil with parmesan & dash of garlic b) Wild mushroms seared in butter and dash of parsley c) baby tomatoes lightly grilled plus fresh basil & boccochini. d) Wine match will complete this.

Hisblah

I was once asked in an exam what a 'hisblah' was. It was for a job interview but all I got was a 2 hour written exam that I didn't know I was sitting. It wasn't my fault when I answered 'a round lamb loaf which you eat with a tomato salad.' It was what was on my mind at the time. Don't ask about the job.

Ingredience:

For the loaf
Flour - 1 1/2 cups then another 1/2 cup
sugar - 2 tsp
dried yeast - 1 tsp
warm water - 1/3 cup

For the filling
Lamb - fatty meaty parts boneless x200g chopped into bite size
Onion x1, diced
Mustard seeds - pinch
Garam masala - pinch
Tumeric powder - pinch
Cumin powder - pinch
Coriander seeds ground - pinch
Fennel seeds - whole, 1/2 tsp
Tomato puree - 90g can

For the salad
Cherry tomatoes - 1 punnet, halved
Watercress - one bunch, rough stalks removed
Garlic - 1 clove crushed
Olive oil
lemon juice
salt & pepper

Method

1. Mix yeast, sugar and warm water together, let stand in warm spot for around 10 minutes or so to ferment. Mix yeast stuff in with flour thoroughly. Cover with glad wrap and stand in warm spot for further 30 minutes. Prepare lamb in meantime.
   
2. Preheat oven to 180c.
   
3. Saute onions in oil in med-high heat, adding mustard seeds half way. Just as mustard seeds pop, add all other spices & mix thoroughly. Add lamb and a pinch of salt & pepper and sear well. Add tomato puree, leaving about 1/4 in the tin, cook briefly and reduce once it begins to bubble. Take off heat to cool.
   
4. (from 1.) Sepearte dough into two. Knead each heavily, adding more flour if necesary to form supple dough. Let each sit for anothe 5 - 10 minutes to grow.
   
5. Flatten out each dough into a flat round shape at 2.5 cm thick with rolling pin.
   
6. Flour the oven tray, place thicker of the two rounds on first. Using a flat spoon, butter on the left over tomato puree on the inside circle of the base - leaving a good 2cm on the edge. Repeat with the other loaf.
   
7. Place lamb mixture onto the base evenly. Cover with the other loaf and secure the edges, leaving two holes on opposite sides as breathing wholes.
   
8. You may make silly patterns on the top of the hisblah with left over dough if you wish.
9. Bake for 30 minutes or till skin is golden brown. Remembering that this will expand so make sure there is enough room up and around for it to do so.
   
10. Salad - soak crushed garlic with lemon juice and a dash of rock salt & peper for 15 minutes to take the edge off. Mix thoroughly with olive oil before dressing onto tomatoes and watercress.
    

WaWa's Melbourne Cup Spread

It would be unAustralian to not go into the office sweepstake when asked politely, nor to bring a dip for 3 o'clock. But its ok if you don't wear spray-on fake tan or call yourself Sheila.

Cornchips and Salsa

Ingredience:
2 just ripe avocados
1/4 red onion
Juice of 1/2 lemon or 1 lime
1 ripe tomato
Handful of coriander
Half a red or green capsicum
Half a cucumber
1 tsp brown sugar if you choose
1 packet of cornships from the shops - Rositas has brought out a new range which is completely bright red.

Method:
1) Dice finely red onions, capsicums and cucumber - they should be about 2mm by 2mm.
2) Soak red onions with lemon for around 20 minutes to take off sharpness
3) Roughly chop tomato, avocado and coriander. Cover avocado with lemon juice straight away to stop from browning.
4) Mix all & chill till ready to serve with cornchips

Tahiniless Hummus
- when you don't have tahini on hand, sour cream is the next best thing

Ingredience:
400 g chickpeas - canned or freshly cooked (soak for 4 hrs then boil for 20 mins)
Juice of one lemon
1/4 cup olive oil
2 Tbs sour cream
1 clove garlic
1/2 tsp cumin powder
Salt & pepper

Method:
1) Blend all in blender - less if you like a coarser texture, more if you are into smoother taste
2) Garnish with Italian parsley or coriander. Keeps for 4-5 days in fridge in airtight container.

Marinated Fetta

Ingredience:
150g Fetta - Danish or greek both fine
1/4 cup olive oil
2 - 3 cloves garlic, crushed & head bit removed
1 tsp whole peper corns
1 tsp whole cumin seeds
4 - 5 sprigs of fresh oregano and or thyme

Method:
1) Break fetta into smaller chunks & marinate everything well mixed in a jar for around 20 hours before serving. Fab with Italian bread!!

Crazy Kiwi Dip
- seems to have appeared in every party I've been to in New Zealand. You'll love the onion bits tenderised in the cream.

Ingredience:
1 packet onion or french onion soup mix
200g can reduced cream (nz) or reduced fat cream (oz)
1 packet of chips

Method:
1) Mix in soup mix and reduced cream - by hand or majic stick, your choice
2) Chill for 1 hr before serving

Other suggestions for another time:
Sushi, broad bean & pecarino paste, pesto - coriander, basil or watercress, homemade lebanese garlic bread

Chocolate Martini

Slip into a little black dress, tune into a bit of bassa nova, swing your hips lightly and sip it with your pinkies up. Let out that little orgasmic "ahh-"...

Ingredience:
2 parts vodka
1 part kahlua
1 part Baileys creme
1 part chocolate or coffee syrup (any flavour)
5-6 ice cubes
1 - 2 scoops rich vanilla or chocolate icecream
1 cup milk or soy milk
1 packet chocolate pokka sticks
2 -3 cubes of eating chocolate (marble or dark/white blend to be fancy), grated finely

Method:
1) Blend everything except pokka sticks and eating chocolate together till ice is well pulsed.
2) Sprinkle half of grated cholate on a plate & spread. Wet rim of martini glasses, dip and coat the rims with choc dust
3) Pour in martini and garnish top with rest of chocolate & pop in the pokka stick as stirrer.

Variations: Add extra hot chocolate or milo powder for extra choc strength, or add a shot of exxpresso coffee for a moccamartini.